I Eat Lots of Soy and Wear Lots of Denim. I am Somtimes Proud to be an American, Thanks for Asking

I do not feel that I cannot call myself a professional writer. I used to be one, before, when I wrote about inventions and was paid (very little) for it. But, since writing about inventions is about as soul-sucking as it can get, and there are only so many times that one can write about odor-eliminating toilets before a personal line is crossed and one wonders how and why one’s life has actually been reduced to shit, I left that job. Currently, I am an Administrative Coordinator, which is a glorified version of a secretary, receptionist or office manager (in an office with no one but myself to “manage”). While I sometimes get to do small writing jobs, such as letters that reflect our company’s qualifications or small project blurbs for the website, I am no longer a professional writer, and at this point in my life, do not see that as a practical career path. I am swimming in student loan debt and will never be able to attain personal goals such as a farmhouse of my own and traveling more if I have to continue to hand over hundreds of dollars each month to my creditors. My writing is now a hobby, which takes some of the performance anxiety out of the equation and eliminates some of the guilt that rises like a bad case of acid reflux when weeks would lapse without the production of good, usable work. Perhaps instead of cranking out copy, I will be a woman who writes freelance articles about my as-yet-to-be-born child (or children) and develops a following among the readers of Family Circle and Parenting. Maybe I will be one of those eccentric, albeit a little crazy, women who sign up for writing workshops. I will gesture dramatically when I speak about the rhythm of the lines, my ethnic-inspired jewelry glinting under the lights. I will wear scarves and expensive leather shoes that I never could have afforded if I still was paying off my loans at 50. And throughout it all I will develop an excellent telephone voice, I will master Excel, I will pick up the donuts on Fridays. I will pay down my debt.

However, I give to you this link to one of my favorite time-killing websites, The Smart Set. They have recently added the humorous column Ask a Poet, where Kristen Hoggatt, a woman who has taken up the writing life answers questions about what it’s like to be a poet. My favorites include answers to inquiries regarding bathing, eating, office attire and the weighted question “Are poets patriotic?” Enjoy.

And if you have some more free time available, be sure to read the column Emily’s World for some great creative non-fiction.